This post is part of a series on Long Distance Relationship Tips, you can find part one here if you missed it Long Distance Relationship Tips Part One
LDR – Loving. Dedicated. Real.
This became our motto, one of the less talked about issues of being in a long distance relationship, is how other people, like family and friends, view your relationship.
I have an acquaintance who has both openly mocked her younger sibling who is in a long-distance relationship. A happily married woman who cannot accept that her sister’s relationship could in any way be considered a relationship.
It was a chance encounter with her and her husband while Paul happened to be with me that she mockingly informed me that her sister was “in a relationship” with someone in a different country.
I chose not to correct her, she was unaware of how Paul and I met and I didn’t fill her in.
It wasn’t the first time and it certainly won’t be the last. If you find yourself having to explain your relationship or justifying it in any way. Don’t feel that you have to.
Long-distance relationships can be difficult, but you should not have to justify or explain yourself to others who can’t or won’t accept what to them seems impossible.
There is an exception to this rule, and that is under age relationships of any kind, this website is intended for adults in long distance relationships and as such we will not cover issues surrounding young adults.
Dealing with Family and Friends when you’re in a Long-Distance Relationship
Everybody is going to have an opinion about your relationship and most likely they will share it with you, whether you asked for their opinion or not.
There will be the small few who are supportive and then there will be the rest. Those who will try and convince you to find someone local. Others who will tell you it will never work and more who will try and put doubts in your head. People will share stories of how their friend of a friend was once in a LDR and how it failed. I don’t understand why people do this. I would never tell a married couple that their marriage is doomed.
You don’t need their opinions unless of course, you sought their opinion in the first place. Most of these people would likely never comment on your relationship if it were not long distance.
How you deal with these opinions is up to you, it can be easier for some people in long distance relationships to simply say that their partner works abroad. For some reason, this is much easier for people to accept than telling them you are in a long distance relationship.
Others prefer to defend their relationship status and if your ok doing that, that’s fine too.
What you shouldn’t do, is let people’s opinions affect your relationship. Only you and your partner know your relationship. So what if your co-worker thinks it will never work out. Or your well-meaning cousin keeps trying to set you up with his or her friend. If you start listening to others it will have a negative effect on your relationship in the long run.
Who Should You Tell About Your Long Distance Relationship?
All that being said, the important people in your life should know about your relationship. They should at least know you are seeing someone and who it is you are seeing.
There are two main reasons for letting people know. The first is safety, especially if you plan to meet early on. The second reason is that over time those close to you will become to accept your relationship choices, they may not approve, but you don’t need to look for their approval. Their acceptance that you are making your own choices, however, is important. It will make things easier for you and your partner in the future.